Describing Nested Containers in Interactive Fiction: Show Which Level Holds Each Object
Identify each object’s immediate container, then explain adjacency, occlusion, and what is currently visible. A fictional suitcase, cloth bag, and exterior pocket show how to turn ambiguous sentences into a container hierarchy that guides inspection one level at a time.
Introduction
When describing nested containers, first establish exactly what holds each object. Then explain what it sits beside, what obscures it, and how much is currently visible. “Inside the suitcase” gives only a broad location. To retrieve a key, readers also need to know which pocket of the cloth bag holds it and whether they must first open the bag.
The complete container hierarchy draft below demonstrates the revision process. The suitcase, cloth bag, and key are original fictional teaching examples, not a real user case, measured results, a record of hands-on testing, or DramaFork product features.
1. Break Ambiguous Sentences into Relationships You Can Check
The sentence to revise is: “There is a key beside the cloth bag in the suitcase, and a scarf is pressed down inside.” This allows more than one interpretation. “Beside” could mean the key is on the bottom of the suitcase or simply near the bag; “inside” could refer to either the suitcase or the bag; and “pressed down” does not identify what is pressing on what. The author can picture the scene, but readers cannot use the sentence to decide what to do next.
For this example, first establish the actual arrangement: the suitcase directly holds the cloth bag and scarf. The scarf lies to the left of the bag, with one end extending underneath it and pinned beneath its base. The bag’s main opening is tied shut. An open pocket sewn onto its exterior faces the person opening the suitcase. The key is tucked into that exterior pocket, with only one corner of its head showing above the edge.
“There’s a key beside the bag” therefore cannot simply be polished into “A key rests next to the cloth bag.” The wording is smoother, but the location is still wrong. Revise it to: “A key is tucked into the cloth bag’s exterior pocket.” This records the complete relationship in the author’s working draft; how much to reveal to readers still depends on the stage of observation.
During revision, circle every “inside,” “beside,” and “under,” and give each an explicit referent. If the result still permits two different arrangements, keep breaking the sentence down instead of leaving readers to decide.
2. Document the Container Hierarchy in Five Fields
The following working draft is for the author to check. It should not be displayed wholesale as the suitcase-opening text. To reuse it, keep the fields and replace the objects and relationships.
| Field | Entry for this example |
|---|---|
| Outer container | Suitcase; initially closed, with its interior available for inspection once opened |
| Direct contents | Suitcase: cloth bag and scarf; cloth bag’s exterior pocket: key; the main compartment’s interior has not yet been described |
| Adjacent objects | The scarf lies to the left of the cloth bag inside the suitcase; both sit directly in the suitcase |
| Occlusion | The bag’s base pins down one end of the scarf; the exterior pocket’s edge and fabric conceal most of the key |
| Inspection by level | Opening the suitcase reveals the bag, scarf, and outline of the pocket; inspecting the bag identifies the exposed corner of the key; inspecting the pocket reveals the whole key |
“Direct contents” lists only objects held without another container between them and the current container. Although the key is also within the suitcase, it must not be listed alongside the bag as though they were two separate objects on the suitcase floor. The exterior pocket is an attached part of the cloth bag, not a separate pouch placed in the suitcase.
Record adjacency and occlusion separately. The scarf being to the left of the bag describes position; one end being pinned beneath the bag describes overlap and an obstacle to an action. “Beside” alone does not establish that the bag must be moved, while “pinned beneath” alone does not locate the visible part of the scarf.
This makes the working draft longer, but gives later prose a clear basis. You can tighten the wording in the displayed text without dropping the relationships.
3. Write a Continuous Sequence: Open the Suitcase, Inspect the Bag, Inspect the Pocket
In this example, opening the suitcase provides only an overview. Inspecting the cloth bag brings the observer closer to identify details, and inspecting the pocket includes gently pulling its edge aside. These are narrative choices for this example, not claims that any software supports these actions by default.
Text for opening the suitcase:
You open the suitcase. A cloth bag sits inside, with a scarf spread out to its left. One end of the scarf extends beneath the bag, pinned under its base. An open pocket is attached to the side of the bag facing you, while the main opening is tied shut with a cord.
This establishes the direct contents, the obstacle to moving the scarf, and a pocket that can be inspected further. It neither lists anything inside the bag’s main compartment nor prematurely presents the key as a separate object in the suitcase.
Text for inspecting the cloth bag:
The cloth bag is still inside the suitcase. You lean closer: its main opening is tied tight, but the exterior pocket is open. One corner of a key’s head projects above the pocket’s edge; the rest is concealed inside.
This identifies the pocket holding the key and distinguishes the two openings. A reader looking for the key now has a reason to inspect the exterior pocket directly, without first untying the main opening’s cord.
Text for inspecting the exterior pocket:
You gently pull aside the edge of the cloth bag’s exterior pocket and look inside. The key is tucked diagonally into the pocket, with its teeth pointing down. You can pinch the exposed head between your fingers. The bag remains inside the suitcase, and you can take out the key without opening the main compartment.
The final sentence states the conditions for the action. If the work offers a “take the key” action, the subsequent text should say, “You take the key out of the cloth bag’s exterior pocket.” On a later inspection, the original description of the exposed corner should be removed. Seeing the key, being able to take it, and having taken it are three different states.
4. Restate the Necessary Parent Location and Keep Counterexamples for Review
During a sequence of inspections, every sentence need not say “the key in the exterior pocket of the cloth bag inside the suitcase.” Give the full description when first entering a new level, then use “the pocket” within a short passage where the reference is unambiguous. Restore the parent location after changing targets, moving a container, or a lengthy stretch of dialogue.
For example, after removing the cloth bag, write: “You set the cloth bag on the table; the key is still tucked into its exterior pocket.” The suitcase is no longer the bag’s current location, so copying the old sentence would introduce a contradiction. Restating the location should establish where things belong after the change, not mechanically recite the entire path.
Keep these three sentences as comparisons during review:
- “There is a key beside the bag in the suitcase”: this establishes proximity only, not that the key is in a pocket.
- “The key is inside the suitcase, against the cloth bag”: this narrows the location, but can still suggest that the key is lying on the suitcase floor.
- “The key is tucked into the exterior pocket of the cloth bag inside the suitcase”: this identifies the immediate container and is suitable for the author’s working draft.
Even the third sentence is not automatically appropriate when the suitcase is opened. Complete knowledge of a location is different from what can currently be observed. Changing word order can clarify which words modify which objects, but cannot replace a judgment about what is visible.
5. Check Boundaries and Failure Points by Restating the Actions
Before handing over the text, read only the three displayed passages and answer these questions in order: What can be seen now? Which part should be inspected to find the key? Must the main opening be untied? Which sentence must change after the key is taken? For this example, the answers on paper are: first see the arrangement inside the suitcase, then identify the corner of the key in the pocket, and finally confirm that the key can be taken after pulling the pocket’s edge aside. The knot at the main opening has no bearing on retrieving the key. This is a textual consistency check, not validation of reader comprehension.
Also check that “not visible” has not become “not present.” A tightly tied main opening establishes only that the interior has not yet been seen; it does not justify declaring the bag empty. Conversely, if the setup changes so that the key is completely hidden deep in the pocket, the bag-inspection text can no longer say that its head is showing. Indicate the pocket opening first, then arrange for the key to be discovered through inspection.
Writing one level at a time increases the number of passages to read. A shallow tray with only one level and fully visible contents can be described in a single sentence; there is no need to manufacture inspection steps. When several similar pockets are present, add stable distinguishing features, such as “the buckled pocket” and “the open pocket,” so that turning the bag does not invalidate left/right labels.
This draft addresses describing object locations in text within containers. It does not cover the reach of state effects across rooms and areas or establish routes between locations. If an action remains confusing, return to the working draft to determine whether the missing information concerns containment, occlusion conditions, or visibility, then revise the relevant sentence.
